Preparing for tml nite!

Heh~ Its Chris Ang's 26th Birthday today!!! And too bad he's at ShangRi-La since Thursday doing duty. He's not allowed to go home cos he's the respond team (????) watever dat is. Anyway, the point is, i bought him a birthday card & cake!!!

Haa..nice??! I so hope dat he'll like this cake. I bought it today from Four Leaves and surprisingly, they do have v nice looking cakes (but whether they tasty anot i duno lar) and i've actually had another cake in mind but it was sold when i went back the 2nd time. The 1st time i went, i tot i can pay by Nets. I didnt noe why i tried to pay by Nets.

Tink i was too tired cos its my 'first' driving lesson today after a 3mth break and oh yes, JW, if u r reading this, haaa...driving is like swimming & cycling i supposed. Once u noe hw, u'll noe hw, lol. But i reali cun wait for my next test on 10th July. I spent $25 on renewing my PDL and another $26 on my one hr lesson today. I actually cancelled 2 lessons but when i tot abt it, i tink better not cos i dun wish to risk failing again. But who's to noe dat my instructor is so hot?! I only cancelled 2 lessons last nite and today he tells me he has only 1 slot left on coming Wednesday..8pm...zzzzz....

I was actually wondering if i shld include Kim Hock's name on the cake but Ken was saying, no need lar. And XW was like, just ignore them pls. weeee~

Oh yes, Xiuhui's bro passed his 3rd driving test and he was so elated he immediately msg me. He even sneered and said he doesnt mind pasting his license on my wind screen..as encouragement~ U guys ever felt ur parents love u less than ur siblings? I get dat feeling all the time but i nv reali acknowledge it cos i guess im juz a bo chap person by nature.

But i juz couldnt get past some incidents and the worse thing is, im often trapped by guilt. I wonder if i'll live in guilt till the day i die. Guilty dat im not earning alot to give them enuf allowance. I'm terrified dat they'll noe about our joint account and the amount of savings we have. I duno why but they just make me feel guilty for planning for myself. I keep tinking back, wondering hw i did grow up lidat? Wat did they do to make me feel this way? I hope to find the answer so dat my future kid will not be like me. But i wun wan to be an atm for my kid too. I only hope they wun worry abt $ until their studies are over dat? And not while they r studying? I tink i would b very proud of my kid if he's able to pay for everything himself after he joins the work force..whether its for his wedding, his car, his upgrading...As long as he himself has enuf, im hapi. Dat shld b the way rite?

Ok, im writing rubbish. Mayb cos i have trouble sleeping. I've been waking up every hr for the past 2 mths & i seriously duno why. I now avoid naps & my favourite tea but it doest seem to help. I have no problem falling aslp. Staying aslp is my problem. Im so tempted to go to my GP and get sleeping pills cos im absolutely shagged out~